Applicatoin

[Skouperd]

Hi GRRR

I am curious to know what it will take to join your clan. Reading up on the forum you require a full pedigree of my history.

Name: Skouperd
Alias: Skoups, Skoupy, Perd, Master Skoups, Oom Skouperd, Denis.
Scientific name: Animalia-chordata-mammalia-perissodactyla-equidae-equus-ferus-caballus
Breed: Because my great grandmother was an American Saddlebred, and my great grandfather an Arabian full bred, I am now classified as a National Show Horse. We’ve only recently been recognized as a breed of our own.
Age: Still only a colt but in 8 months I’ll be classified as a stallion
Height: 19.1h, which is slightly taller than a typical NSH horse
Weight: 17 stones

Claim to fame:
At the tender age of 7 months, while still being an innocent foal, I was introduced to electronic stimulation. I believe this is now a pre-requisite subject in riding school.

While still a yearling, I served the battalion with great honor and was directly responsible for the death of 12,119 opponents. Unfortunately, my rider at the time had some issues and he got me killed way more than that. I subsequently fired him and was taken under the wing by the [HF] Red Cross Medical Division at which stage I was promoted to a 2nd Lieutenant.

In order to keep fit I’ve turned to the racing tracks every so now and again. As a result of this, I’ve been the bookie favorite for the Durban July for the last 2 years running, but according to some critics, I am just a real mania on the track.

I’ve recently been re-introduced to strategic planning which involves the creating and execution of total annihilation to one’s enemy. I find an unexplainable joy in destroying another’s stable especially when they were confirmed distributors of nuclear weapons.

Other interest:
As mentioned, I was introduced to electronic stimulation while still a foal. Since then, I’ve realized that one could connect several of my companions on the same system thereby sharing thoughts and experiences; this is a feeling of unsurpassed pleasure.

Prolonged exposure to electronic stimulation made me addicted thereto, and as such, I have been charged as being a distributor for this deadly equipment.

I trust that I have provided most of the information required to join the GRRR clan, but should you require more, feel free to ask.

Adios
Skouperd

[J_Th4ng]

Hmmm, an applicant that can't spell 'Application'... That doesn't bode well for the interrogation. Having said that, this must be the first application that we've ever actually had from a horse, so I guess that allowances must be made...

Take it away guys

From a personal standpoint, welcome Denis. It's been a long wait, but I knew we'd get you to apply in the end...

[flycatchr]

hi skoups

1) why did you leave HF?
2) why is 42 in fact NOT the answer to life the universe and everything
3) what is a hairy blender
4) you have answered what you are, and almost answered who you are, but why are you and when are you?

[Paul]

Hmmm, an applicant that can't spell 'Application'... That doesn't bode well for the interrogation......

Dude you stole my thunder I was going to tune something similar. One thing you will learn Skouperd is that spelling and grammar are hoy cows around here.

Ok so what can you bring to grrr and why do you want to join grrr (other than the fact that I am here, making it the most awesome clan in the wereld)?

[SlipperyDuck]

if you were a ghei horse, who's tail would you rather be nuzzling, s3xy_J0nny or Candi_Paul_Date?

[Skouperd]

Thanks Jarrod, and as you very well know, I am better known for my numeracy skills than my linguistic skills.

_________________________________________________

Flycathcer;

1. why did you leave HF?

The key reasons:
- They are spread out around the country thus making gatherings only applicable to RAGE. During a recent LAN party, there were a fair number of GRRR guys there and it was fun.
- They have kiddies in the clan, who apparently get offended when being tea bagged, or even worse, have no idea what it means.
- HF don’t attend my LAN’s
- HF ended last in all the BattleField leagues

2. Why is 42 in fact NOT the answer to life the universe and everything

Where shall we start? Ok, analyzing the number 42, we note that the sum of its digits equals 6, since 6 is a perfect number, classified by the sum of its factors equal to the number itself, Douglas Adams might have thought at first sight that this will solve his problem. Upon later investigation though, one will realize that 6 is not as perfect as it is made out to be, because it lacks prime. Multiplying the two numbers, 4 x 2, one gets 8. Adams might have been excused for reading too much Terry Pratchett, but he was on the right track none the less and any amateur might be excused for making the same error he did. After all, using the first perfect number’ factors, raise them all to each other’s power, i.e. 1 to the power of 2 to the power of 3 equals 8. However again 8 lacks prime and as such fails to be considered the perfect solution. This leaves us with 4 / 2, which results in the answer of 2. Now this is a much better going for Douglas since 2 is the concept of binary, it is prime, actually it is the first prime number, it is the reason for BattleField so perfection is close, but it is unfortunately not a perfect number either because nobody likes 2nd place. Ergo, 42 is not the answer to life the universe and everything.

Ps, I am analytical in nature… and love numbers… ;-)

3) what is a hairy blender

The answer will depend on the context and whether or not this board is trolled by people less than 18 years. Shall we assume this board is trolled by those unfortunately school going individuals, then the answer will be the hairy drink served after liquidizing a monkey, mixed with some spar-berry juice and served ice cold. Should the forums not be trolled by those unfortunate, then I would imagine it involves the blending of certain hair. I can imagine a scenario of a certain knife kill that could potentially cause this to happen, I could even imagine a screenshot whereby a sucker lies on the ground and another person assume the crouch position. However, those images that I left out because they should better not be put on a public board, will now haunt me for the rest of the day, thank you Flycatcher.

4) you have answered what you are, and almost answered who you are, but why are you and when are you?

I could rewrite this, but the following dialogue explains it perfectly:

The Architect: Your life is the sum of the remainder of an unbalanced equation inherent to the programming of the Matrix. You are the eventuality of an anomaly, which despite my sincerest efforts I have been unable to eliminate from what is otherwise a harmony of mathematical precision. While it remains a burden assiduously avoided, it is not unexpected, and thus not beyond a measure of control, which has led you, inexorably, here.

Neo: You haven't answered my question

The Architect: Quite right.... Interesting, that was quicker than the others. The Matrix is older than you know. I prefer counting from the emergence of one integral anomaly to the emergence of the next, in which case this is the sixth version.


_________________________________________________

Paul:
One thing you will learn Skouperd is that spelling and grammar are hoy cows around here.

Don't you mean “ho(l)y cows”?

_________________________________________________

SlipperyDuck
if you were a ghei horse, who's tail would you rather be nuzzling, s3xy_J0nny or Candi_Paul_Date?

Continuing from where I left off with Flycather’:

Neo: …Choice, the problem is choice.

The Architect: As I was saying, she stumbled upon a solution whereby nearly ninety-nine percent of the test subjects accepted the program provided they were given a choice - even if they were only aware of it at a near-unconscious level. While this solution worked, it was fundamentally flawed, creating the otherwise contradictory systemic anomaly, that, if left unchecked, might threaten the system itself. Ergo, those who refused the program, while a minority, would constitute an escalating probability of disaster.

I must be part of the 1%

[s3xy_j0nny]

DAMMIT! Jarrod's response corrected your spelling, then your first answer corrects Candy's spelling! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO HAVE ANY FUN IN THIS THREAD?!

No questions from me - you're in there like swimwear as far as I'm concerned. Just make a couple of spelling mistakes for me to correct and I'll be happy.

[J_Th4ng]

s3xy_j0nny ]
DAMMIT! Jarrod's response corrected your spelling, then your first answer corrects Candy's spelling! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO HAVE ANY FUN IN THIS THREAD?!

No questions from me - you're in there like swimwear as far as I'm concerned. Just make a couple of spelling mistakes for me to correct and I'll be happy.

I wouldn't worry about that, our friend Denis is sure to provide you with plenty of opportunity to unleash your inner spelling nazi.

As he said himself, His linguistic skills pale in comparison to his arithmetic genius

[flycatchr]

since everyone else just seems to be horsing around with you,

WHY are the professors looking for the highest prime number, and of what benefit is that to the terminal velocity of a truncated icoshedron?

[Onyx]

Its Monday, fly - be gentle with the man.

I love horses, so by default you have my vote. Should anything crazy come to mind for me to ask you - I might post it later.